Five different 'creative' work phases

I went to see Martin Orton of Bold Creative; they do dem tings wiv da yoot. We got to talking and he disclosed to me the theory of the ‘five different work phases.’ Despite sounding like a long lost martial art it works like this:

1) The first stage of your working life revolves around people paying you purely for your time, i.e. low skilled, Mcjobs.

2) Employers then start paying you purely for a skill set, i.e. mad milking cow skills.

3) A combo arises where sooner of later people pay you for both typing or drawing away but also the rare light bulb incidents too.

Next, “Hey I don’t want to move my hands ever again, I want to be like that worm thing in Dune and only move vast distances with the power of my mind (and the spice).



4) Money's coming in for ideas but, oh dear, there’s someone on the tier below who’ll make your ideas a reality and for cheaper!

5) You’ve been churning out ideas for a good long while and your body is now withered but your mind pulsates like a sea of jellyfish. Well done, you’ve now entered the last phase where your ideas are so awe inspiring people simply refer to you as ‘He’ or ‘Him.’

“Shhhh, you must not speak his name less his creative gaze fall upon us.”