Green Tea

If you leave the tea too long it tastes like failed politician. It's SO good for you they should strap people down and inject it directly, saving the NHS.

Green Tea originates in deepest Asia where dragons propelled by human legs still roam free. Paddy fields full of Irish refugees that fled the carnage of the Guinness Wars, work ceaselessly to create replica blarney stones, funding the war effort. One day they will return to the Emerald Isle and overthrow the Adversary who is half man, half foam.

Prawn crackers are the remnants of the once Great Dream Prawn who ruled all Asia. His followers sucked human brains clean out their skulls. Such was the tyranny that a call went out to build the Deep Fryer of Despair. Ever since the Day of Accompanying Plum Sauce, prawns have bowed down (hard, they have no knees)